Patience and Pain

Have you ever wanted something so bad that you'd do anything for it. This isn't something that you just casually want and can let go, but instead something that overwhelmes your thinking. This is how I feel about being a youth pastor. This is my passion. So much that I and my wife left all we know and completely changed our lives to make this happen. The issue is that now I've come to a place where I can do it, but find that the vision God's given me will not only take a long time but at the same time take a specific place. This means that I must wait. I believe in God and know He's more incredibly awesome than I could ever understand. I wish He'd give me just a little more of what he wants...the how would be nice. You might ask, ok there's the patience part, but what about the pain? Well the pain comes from wanting to get going. I'm like a viper car in a parking lot. It has a need to get out do what it was meant to do, but can't b/c it's not the time yet. I'm ready, I'm willing, so where's the mission? I feel like Isaiah, God's asking who will go for me, and Isaiah is jumping, screaming I will go, send me! So now the patience and pain are mixed. For now I jump and scream...and yet I wait! God rocks, Jtw

I'm Done....THANK GOD

Well got the most awesome freakin news....I'M DONE with School...YEAH. Thursday was the day I took my last exam of my bachelor's degree. I now have a B.S. in Religion with a specialization in Youth Ministry. Wow that sounds so freakin awesome. God has now gifted me and taught me with this very special training, so now I'm ready to use it. I'm busy looking at some churches, so pray for me. I really want to thank each person who's been praying for me, but since that would take all of time, I'm saying here....THANK YOU ALL. Well praise God for helping me and getting me through everything. God totally Rocks, JtW

A post from Ben Kasica

Ben Kasica is in a band named Skillet. He wrote something on his myspace that was just awesome and I think everyone should read it. So here it is...

They say that the way to unhappiness is to try to make yourself happy but to truly make yourself happy, you must give your life away in self forgetful love. Its so easy nowadays to always be thinking about youself, How can I make myself happy? What can I buy for me? How many friends do I have on my mspace? What do I get from it? etc etc...Our culture is so self centered. And because of it, we are a discontent people. Always wanting more because that little bit that we did happen to scrounge to devour for ourselves didn't fulfill us in the way that we thought it would. So we search for more. Constantly thinking that the new gadget or the better paying job or winning the lottery or a new girlfriend is going to make us happy. I can save you a lot of time and heartache and tell you now that no thing that you find in this world is going to satisfy you. It was never meant to. However, there is something... someone who can meet that desire inside you. A Love that will fulfill never fail you and it always there to meet your heart's deepest desires. And once you have that divine discontent met, it provides you the opportunity to give of yourself more completely in loving others. Living your life for other people. But to try to love other people in and of yourself can seem impossible at times. Especially if you're trying to love the unloveable. It's like trying to get that very last bit of toothpaste out when you know that there's not really any left... you still try...You try so hard to love people but really you're just dont have the ability to do it. You're empty. But when you love others out of that deeper Love that you have, it makes it easy. Because you're loving not out of a desperation and will to love but out of an abundance of love.And when we are able to love in that way, we can truly find happiness.Go love others. Do something selfless. Go help an old lady cross the street. Volunteer at a homeless shelter. Pay for a stranger's groceries. Visit an retirement community just to talk with people. You will find that the joy that you get out of it is worth far more than what it cost you.
Ben

A Christian's Job Description

Before you read this, you just agree with me that you won't get mad but instead read it in hopes that we can all change to be more like Christ.

A Christian's Job Description

After looking around at people I know and those I respect, I saw something that truly scared the crap out of me; they're Christians. That didn't scare me because I think that's wrong, but because they claimed to be Christians in light of how they were living. So I decided that I would write a Job description for Christians. I don't write this because I'm doing it all or because I'm hyper-spiritual. I do it because, like I hope it will convict you, because it convicts me to do better. So here it goes...…

1) Be saved!
Well that seems very easy, but how many of us think we're saved due to a huge emotional experience? I would say that a lot of us are in this boat. I believe that being saved requires a change. I'm not saying an immediate change, but over a period of time you become a whole different person than you were before you were saved.

2) Pray
What the junk is up with people not knowing how to pray and still claiming to be a Christian? How did they get saved in the first place? You need to pray. I'm not saying you should pray so much that you don't get anything done. You should pray and not as an excuse so you don't have to make a decision right now. Telling people I'll pray about is not a valid reason. I've got an idea, pray right now and if you don't get an answer then make a decision and if it's wrong, God will let you know.

3) Don't Judge
Christians today get a very bad rap because some of them judge others and treat them like crap because they sin. Guess what, you sin too! God's the only one that should be judging so you should shut up and keep it to yourself. God treated people with Love, even when he was talking to them about sin in their life. Try being like Jesus and if you can't don't claim to be a Christian. Does this mean that you shouldn't want to help people who are in sin and let them know they are? NO. You should definately let them know they're sinning, but to treat them like crap for it is so overly stupid that some people need to be slapped. Tell them in love, then help them to overcome it IF they want help.

4) Read God's Word
I'm as guilty as anyone in saying that I don't know enough scripture. God's word is essential to your walk with Christ. How can you claim to know Christ if you know nothing about Him? Jesus also used scripture to defeat Satan, maybe that's a good place to start when you want to defeat your sins? People ask what would Jesus do, but I say what DID Jesus do? Let's read God's word before everyone is so scripturally illiterate that Christians start being seen as spiritually retarded.

5) Walk the Walk
If you're going to be a Christian and call yourself a Christian, then freakin start acting like one. Some people are trying their best to be a follower of God and they get all the stupid stereotypes because someone along the way was a major hypocrite. So any time you screw up or just aren't living the life God's called you to live, and someone ask if you're a Christian, then don't tell them about Jesus and bring Shame to God and His people.

6) Stand up
I don't believe that we should be the Christian Taliban, but we should not sit there while people MOCK AND CURSE our GOD. Why do people just sit there and be quiet when people do all they can to make Christianity a stupid game. We aren't that at all. We know that Jesus is the ONLY way to Heaven and everyone else is going to hell, so how can we just sit there and not tell those we love about Jesus? If you can't stand up for what you believe and change the world, then please don't be a Christian.

In saying all this...…
It's not an inclusive list, but instead a list to inspire thinking. I'm not doing this to be a prideful person, but instead to challenge all of us to live up to what I've written here. If this is a problem and you find this list, though not finished, an outrage, I ask you please for the sake of your soul seek after God and think about this list. I'll pray for you and you should respond to this for me. Thank you for reading this and I'll try to update it as I come across things in myself and others that claim to be Christians, that should change.

Remember this verse: Titus 1:16
"They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him. They are detestable disobedient and unfit for doing anything good."

Here's a quote from a DC TALK song that you should remember

"The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians; who acknowledge Jesus with their lips, then walk out the door and deny him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable."

God's pushing

Do you ever get the idea that God's pushing and you're not listening? I get that impression in my life right now. I'm finishing up school in 7 weeks and I have no idea where I'm going after that. I don't know if God wants me to stay here, go way far away, or even in this country. I wish I truly knew. All I know is that God's put a passion for students in me that won't be satisfied until I can help students by showing them the love of Jesus Christ. God pushes, but I'm not sure why or how. I'm listening, but not hearing. A lot of people say that God whispers, but I don't believe that. I believe that God screams at us most of the time, and we as people are so deaf because we don't want to hear God that when we want to hear we've become so accustom to not hearing that we don't. I was asked the other day why don't we hear from God like they did during biblical times. My answer is that we don't want to. People say they want to hear from God and want to do His will, but what if he told you to go do something you didn't want to do? Would you do it? What if I actually heard from God and he said go to Iraq right now, find this specific person and when you told them of Me they would kill you. What would I do then? Honestly I'm not sure what I would do. I'd like to think I'd die for my Lord because He died for me, but I can't honestly say I would until I'm put in that situation. God's pushing. Do you ever want to scream to God for an answer or maybe you actually do it? I know I do. To truly be transparent I must admit that I've never doubted God's existence, but at times I do doubt God's listening to me. I know I work on His time and not not the other way around. Recently lots of bad things have happened and it's like I feel God pushing to test our stamina in our faith. So does God's pushing help me? Right now I feel like it could, but doesn't feel like it right now. As I tirelessly pray everyday and I hope others do, that God will soon give me a glimpse of what He has for me, in a way I hope it's soon. Normally I'm a very patient person. I don't usually let things get to me hardly ever, and I work well under large amounts of pressure. This made me a good medic and a good youth pastor. Lately, the pressure has been very high which is fine, but with all these bad things and God's test it's becoming harder to keep up. I end with this prayer: God please help me. I need your wisdom, your patience, and your overwhelming love. God speak to me soon to give me a glimpse of your plan and the path you want for me. Lord I want to be like Isaiah and say "Here am I Lord, send me." Thank you for your protection and salvation. Thank you. Amen. God Rocks, Jtw

What the Junk's with Jesus Camp -- STAND UP

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=98591593

Ok here's the link to a site for something called Jesus Camp. Jesus Camp is a movie that's coming out that is a documentary of the generation of youth today that's coming up and will bring out revival in America. This sounds great, but it's not. Watch the preview and let me know what you think. Here's what I commented on when I wrote them that pretty much gives my thoughts on the matter.

Well... I really want to see this movie. I'm a youth pastor and I know the next youth of today will be the turning point for the generation. In saying that I am a little scared of this movie based on the preview here. It talks about evangelical Christians, but none are shown in the video. It almost sounds like you're training kids as an army. All you're creating is a Christian Taliban. Is that what you want? I believe this will have the opposite effect that you're trying to get across here. Just like the da Vinci code, the movie will show the exact opposite of it's intended effect. Don't make this nation anymore secular by making Christians seem like extremist. We're not out for Judgment and just because these people are, doesn't mean we all are. I pray that everyone doesn't lump all Christians together to be like you guys, b/c we're totally not. Please don't say we are!

You might think I way harsh, but I doubt you will when you see the preview. The youth of today are the generation that's going to decide if the revival we so desperately need will come about. God wants us to have a revival where we all turn to Christ like we've never before. All revivals in HISTORY that were ever significant were started by people under the age of 18. If you're one of the students then I want you to know that I'm praying for you. If you're an adult begin praying for them. They call our generation a post-Christian generation, there's people on TV everyday cutting Christians down, and there's people who specifically Mock our God and everyone thinks it's ok. They think it's ok because we don't stand up for God.

I wrote the other day a Job description for a Christian that I will soon put up on here. I don't meet all these things all the time, but I'm trying because Jesus calls me to Seek after Him. In this document I think that all Christians should stand live for God and stand up for Him. If you can't handle it, don't claim to be a Christian. I'm so sick of the minority of people setting the rules for the majority because the majority doesn't stand up. Christians are the majority in this country, but unless we stand up we're just silently accepting what they say.

Now for Jesus Camp. You read what I have said above. Don't let this movie be another slap in the face to those of us who call ourselves followers of Christ. EVERYONE is going to use this movie. The people who hate Christians will label all of us as terrorist, Christians will point to a change through the next generation, and the rest of the people will see it and be afraid that we're trying to dictate their lives. I CAN'T STAND IT ANY LONGER!!!! More evil than good is going to come from this movie. I ask that anyone and everyone stand up and let people know that Christians are not silent, we're not here to force you to do anything, we're here to save your life. I can't take anymore. God Rocks, JW

And then there were 3

That's right everyone, there's 3 left from our list of churches that we're looking at right now. You can cut out Grace Bible Church. We went there, and it was a long way for a very short day trip, but we went. That church is out, we felt it wasn't the place for us. Not sure how to explain what God was telling us, but it was definately not the place God wanted for us. A couple of days ago I got a letter from them the other day, and it confirmed what we'd known since the day we went and visited. I still left it open and didn't contact them b/c I wanted to wait for God's answer and not my own. Next, a good friend that I get advice from time to time from advised me to get away from the denomational lines. I'm definately considering it in light of the last church... If you wan know what I mean let me know. The only problem is that I owe a lot of my church experience to my old Baptist church that I grew up in. So what do I do? I've decided that I'm going to keep them open, but keep looking for non-denominational churches. Ok as for the second church you can cut out, that's Gayton Baptist Church. Funny thing is that it's a church that we weren't sure about from the beginning. The site was very vague and really didn't say much about the church. We didn't visit the church, but felt weird about it. Well they didn't feel I was the best fit, so that one's out.
OK so... What does that leave? That leaves 3 other churches that we're looking at and I'm going to give you them in order of what I feel is the best feeling towards them.

1) Westover Church (NC) -- I've visited this church and it was freakin awesome. They were very people oriented and even the people in my family got a hug from a complete stranger. They have a large youth group and are focused on missions. What are the drawbacks? I'm not sure there is any except with this large of a church, it's going to be hard to learn all the students and try not to let anyone fall through the cracks. The answer is that I have leaders to be me to everyone...So now it's up to you.

2) NewSpring Community Church (SC) -- I haven't visited this church because it's in SC and hard to travel there with school, work, and a life. The main perks to this job is the leadership. The Senior pastor is a old youth pastor. He knows all the problems and will work with the issues that most people don't understand. They've also got an awesome youth room if you wanna go to the site and look at the pics. They truly love their students. The drawbacks are first the senior pastor. I know I said it's a perk, but let me explain. The pastor would be able to see the issues and be sincere to them, but he'll also have greater expectations. He's been there and done exactly what I wanna come in and do. It's like trying to teach Michael Jordan's basketball team to play basketball with him on the sitting there watching you. It would definately be nerve racking for me. What do you think?

3) Pinecrest Baptist Church (VA) -- I again haven't been to this church. This church caught my eye, but again had a weird site. I know you're gonna point out the denomination, but I'm going to be open. If you haven't visited their site lately, it's much better now. I can't say a lot about this church other than it seemed good. Because of the lack of good, I can't really point out the drawbacks other than the location. This isn't a problem b/c I'm just gonna go where ever God sends me.

So what have we learned? God's taken out some, he's left others, and I'm sure as I keep looking and praying for God's will that he'll send me more. Keep praying, go look at these sites again, and let me know about what you think. Thanks for your help and prayers. God Rocks, Jtw

I'm not alright

Artist: Sanctus Real
Album: The Face Of Love
Song: I'm Not Alright

If weakness is a wound
That no one wants to speak of
Then “cool” is just how far we have to fall
I am not immune
I only want to be loved
But I feel safe behind the firewall
Can I lose my need to impress?
If you want the truth, I need to confess
I’m not alright
I’m broken inside, broken inside
And all I go through
It leads me to you, it leads me to you
Burn away the pride
Bring me to my weakness
Until everything I hide behind is gone
And when I’m open wide
With nothing left to cling to
Only you are there to lead me on
Cause honestly, I’m not that strong
I’m not alright
I’m broken inside, broken inside
And all I go through
It leads me to you, it leads me to you
And I move, and I move, and I move...closer to you
And I move, and I move, and I move...closer to you
And I move, and I move, and I move...closer to you
And I move, and I move, and I move...
I’m not alright
I’m broken inside, broken inside
broken inside, broken inside
And all I go through
Leads me to you, leads me to you
I’m not alright, I’m not alright, I’m not alright...that’s why I need you

Yo service vs worship

Yo everybody my new few blogs will definitely be weird so don't freak out on me. I've been reading a book recently that talks about youth workers and how they fall into a trap of spending so much time in service to God that they don't worship God and their personal relationship with God is hurt through it. I recognized that the warning signs listed are totally me and I've become fairly stupid because of it. If you don't know what I mean then that's ok, I'm saying that I've spent so much time trying to be God to people that I can no longer just turn around and talk to God because I've moved to far away. Man I feel stupid, I mean who can't feel themselves moving away from God right? Well a lot of people think that service equals holiness, well it's not and I'm a good example of this. I do a lot of help students, and they don't even know it sometimes. So I've decided to follow the books advice and return to God. I'm going to have to rely on God more, and purposefully return to God. If I start saying NO more to people it's because I'm spending that time in worship to God and getting myself back on track with God. Please don't be mad at me if I refuse to do something, but it's only because I can't honestly teach you something that I don't feel. This is why I've decided that my personal relationship with Jesus will now come before others. This is the way it should be but I've forgotten that. I've become a stranger to God and now I MUST return to a brother and a disciple...I hope you understand...My God bless you all and I'll be here for everyone. I've not abandoned anyone, just cut back on the yes in order to say yes to Jesus instead...Thanks Kbye God Rocks, Jtw

yo visited a few churches

Well for those of you that actually read this and want to help, I visited 2 of the 4 churches and found one other for your viewing. I don't want to tell you which is which because I want you to keep praying for all of them. The first one I visited shannon was going there with very low expectations. She didn't like it from the site. It was a large church, and frankly it was awesome. It was very inviting, I even got a hug from a perfect stranger. They were geared toward helping others and huge on prayer. This one has a lot of pros and cons, so keep prayer for this one going. The one I went to last Sunday wasn't as good. It had a few things that were better than the first church, but there was a problem. We only had one person talk to us and we are the one's that started talking to them. A huge problem was the service. It had a lot of older people in it trying to be something they're not. They were trying very hard to be relevant to the culture and they weren't and shouldn't have been. It's easy to pick out a fake a mile away. So now what? I'm keeping this church open because we could help if they'd let us and I'm not going to say no to God if he choses that place. Keep praying for both of these churches, regardless of what I may think of them.
Ok here's the new one that I wrote to the other day, but not heard back yet. This one is a church started by a youth pastor, which is cool and scary at the same time. Let me know whatcha think.
www.newspring.cc
Let me know whatcha think. Well Thanks for all the prayer and I look forward to hearing from you on whatcha think and what I can do about this. God Rocks, Jw